Category Archives: Dead Celebrity Gossip
Phil Mickelson Cures Cancer
“Oh, geez. I’m sorry, I didn’t know. Yikes. Cancer.” Choi then proceeded to miss all of his remaining birdie putts, each time saying half-heartedly, “Oops.”
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Donovan McNabb Traded and Then Killed
People didn’t understand that McNabb get’s very excited sometimes and that when he gets excited he’s liable to choke games if things get out of hand.
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Garth Brooks Returns
Chris Gaines, the alternative rock singer, was found dead in a hotel bathroom early Sunday morning. According to reports, he overdosed on heroine and Fen-Phen.
“I made him, I can destroy him,” said Brooks.
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Demi Lovato Murdered by Jonas Brothers Fans
Demi Lovato, the star of teen productions like Sonny with a Chance and Camp Rock 2, accidentally let it slip on Friday that she was dating a Jonas brother. On Sunday her dismembered corps was found in a dumpster on the back lot of Disney studios. Continue reading
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Oscar Winner
For the past 12 hours after winning her Oscar for best director and best picture, Kathryn Bigelow has been beaten, stabbed, shot, electrocuted, hanged, drawn and quartered and raped…by James Cameron.
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Jay Leno Show; Murder Mystery
“We discovered Mr. Leno in asfixiated in his garage after sucking on a garden hose that had been attached to the muffler of a car,” explains sheriff Francis McDaniel. Continue reading
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Satan Reneges Deal With Larry The Cable Guy
It comes as no surprise to anyone with a sense of humor that Larry the Cable Guy’s success and fame has stemmed from making a deal with Lucifer, but an interesting development has surfaced regarding the pact the two have made: Satan … Continue reading
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Michael Bay Blows Himself… Up
We all knew it was coming. It was just a matter of time. But finally, Transformaers 3 director Michael Bay did what we all expected him to do, and blew himself… up.
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Brittany Murphy Died From Pneumonia Overdose
Brittany Murphy has faded back into pop culture by fatally overdosing on prescription pneumonia. The 32 year old bubbly actress, brought to fame by appearing in such films as The Prophecy II and an episode of Blossom, collapsed in the … Continue reading
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John Edwards Found Murdered
“I couldn’t have done this without your blood thirsty cries for my husband’s severed head,” said Elizabeth in a prepared statement. “I did it to break the glass ceiling for the abused wives of scummy politicians everywhere. Let’s nail their balls to a tree!”
Filed under Dead Celebrity Gossip, National News, Rumor Mill
