Monthly Archives: May 2010

by | May 28, 2010

Oil Spill Reaches Chocolate River

Cocoa Beach, FL—The oil spill that has leaked millions of gallons of crude into the Gulf of Mexico has reached the shore of Willy Wonka’s chocolate river, causing the world’s largest candy maker to take desperate measures in order to preserve its naturally flavored resource. Continue reading →

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by | May 14, 2010

Terrorist Group Severs Ties with Nissan

FRANKLIN, TN—For the past 17 years, Nissan Motors has had the distinction of being the official car maker of the world’s most dangerous terrorist organization. But, a pair of failed car bombings has forced Al-Laddin to end their partnership with the Japanese automobile company. Continue reading →

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by | May 12, 2010

Mayor Nutter Does The Impossible!

“He is crack personified,” Nutter added. “No, no, he isn’t just ‘crack,’ he is bigger than crack; he is Baby Shoes Galaxia!”
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by | May 11, 2010

NBC’s Celebrity Apprentice Renamed “Celebrity” Apprentice

“Let’s face it: these people are not celebrities; they’re punch-lines, has-beens, phonies, idiots, drug addicts, and most likely all have at least one STD.” Continue reading →

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