Monthly Archives: March 2010
Wireless Battery Re-Charger Runs on Batteries
If buying a wireless battery charger keeps one tree alive or something, I’ll buy one. Continue reading
Filed under High Comedy
“Ice Ice Baby” Emanates From Studio Apartment
The more he plays it, the more I fear him. Continue reading
Filed under High Comedy
Where is Sean Penn?
Penn was then devoured by the Haitians who left nothing but the cleaned skeleton of a truly incredible individual. His sacrifice was a great thing and will be apreciated by all that watch the morning news on Monday. Continue reading
Filed under Global Stuff
How to get a job
First, we have the eye contact. Everybody is giving decent eye contact nowadays. Stand out! Open your eyes as wide as you can and lean forward the whole time, staring into the interviewer’s face. Continue reading
Filed under Editorial
Sarah Palin Critisizes Herself for Trig Remark
“I would just like apologize for my outburst after Trig had rubbed chocolate cake into the carpet was completely unwelcome. I should have known better, he sure didn’t.”
-Sarah Palin Continue reading
Filed under Editorial, High Comedy, Rumor Mill
Garth Brooks Returns
Chris Gaines, the alternative rock singer, was found dead in a hotel bathroom early Sunday morning. According to reports, he overdosed on heroine and Fen-Phen.
“I made him, I can destroy him,” said Brooks.
Continue reading
Filed under Dead Celebrity Gossip
Nike Unveils New Shoe
In what is being called a “frightening” combination of innovation and ingenuity, Nike has developed a technology that replicates human tissue and muscle. DNA is extracted from a human and then blended with a synthetic strengthening material. Once the outer shell is complete, an ultra-light form-fitting inner sole is added inside the shoe. The end product is something that Lessinger says would “make Victor Frankenstein cream in his pants.” Continue reading
Filed under High Comedy, National News
Top Ten iPhone Apps
iBreathe—Don’t let all these apps take your breath away! Just download the iBreathe application to allow yourself to take oxygen into your lungs and magically release carbon dioxide out into the air! Only from iPhone! Continue reading
Filed under top ten lists
St.Patrick’s Day Mystery
You may be wondering why you don’t see the little people on St. Patrick’s Day. And it seems that there are fewer and fewer wee people around on that day with each passing year. Well, if you listen closely on St. Patrick’s Day eve, you’ll hear the pitter patter of little feet as the little folk scamper for their very lives to safety.
Filed under Global Stuff, High Comedy, National News
Bad Sex
DVD Menus Loops During Loss of Virginity Kristen Stabler and Ryan Hokum, both of Havertown, Maryland, engaged in their first coital act together Saturday night while the menu of the DVD they had been watching looped continuously. The DVD … Continue reading
Filed under High Comedy
